Comments for Stop Snoring Aids

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by Dabuchica

Dabuchica — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:50:01 +0000

I applaud you undertaking this project. I hope you finish it and it goes well for you.

I think I would have liked things to be a little more fleshed out. I got a little lost on what happened, what was a dream, what was reality… Maybe you could flesh that out as well. Some of the sentences are a little awkward. Try to pare them down. One thought per sentence. Also, we don’t have a feel for how old our main character is.

The voice of the father in that letter is very good. Totally believable.

Good luck!

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by Kelsey N

Kelsey N — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:46:02 +0000

I think that it could use some work, but it is a good start. First, you might want to correct alot of the spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors. This would help to make it clearer, as I had a little trouble reading it. Also, the first sentence didn’t really make sense to me. I think that if dreams are so important in this book, you should have a dream become kind of like the hook that catches readers in the first couple of pages.
This was the major problem that I saw with this book. For a good book, I think that the plot needs to be released a little bit at a time, and it should begin with a situation that draws in the reader. If you are having difficulty doing this, google novel writing tips, and you should get a pretty good list.
I think that you are on your way to being a great writer. Please post more as I would love to read it and help you with this book. If you have any questions, feel free to contact me at Dosblackdogs@aol.com.
Keep up the good work!
Kelsey

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by Lil_goth_ladie

Lil_goth_ladie — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:31:51 +0000

Aaah. <3 I want to read more +_+

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by P36606Xox

P36606Xox — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:03:29 +0000

Well, several points!

1. That is not how writing is done, you don’t break them up into pages like that, each page has 250 words and yours are to short,also you wouldn’t say page one page two and so on you would just have them in chapters.

2. Your grammar and spelling is really really really bad, you should have at least edited once before having us look over it.
ex.
you used to when it should have been too!

3. I do think that the story line was more original than some.

4. It was quiet describitive which was good.

5.Hope this helps and if you need any other help become one of my contacts and i’ll email you.

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by future

future — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 16:15:30 +0000

why didn’t the father just tell her “that her mother’s looks have changed” instead of giving her that book?

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by Lyra S

Lyra S — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 15:31:30 +0000

ya i like it!

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by Lauren

Lauren — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 15:26:17 +0000

Sounds a bit too much like Twilight.

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by crempel2007

crempel2007 — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 15:04:33 +0000

Technically the writing is not that good. The story is interesting however. Also, your pages seem incredibly short!

Comment on Book Writing answer honestly? by Chris L

Chris L — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 14:36:50 +0000

Honestly you are no Tom Clancy but i guess keep going, book SUCKS!! Read clear and present danger for ideas…

Comment on Any advice on what to do about joint pain, particularly when sleeping (or trying to)? by Arthur A

Arthur A — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 02:55:58 +0000

The are many over the counter pain relievers to perhaps help your problem but before taking any medications you should consult your doctor. I seem to know what it is by not getting sleeping because of pain. I’ve have back problems for many years, whereby my doctor gives me pain killers and sleeping pills just so at night I can get to sleep in order to get up for work.